saturday story.

by josh on February 13th, 2010

so i go to the bank today….

and as i am driving in….i find myself following this minivan with the license plate “GOODMOM3″. first i thought to myself, “hehe….nice try, but there are apparently 2 other moms greater than you!”

what was even funnier though? in the back window was this huge decal that said, “peace, love & hope”. huh? “that’s pretty fuckin’ ghey”, i thought to myself. however, i was still really curious about what kinda person was driving this minivan of greatness. she happened to be pulling into the bank too…so it was perfect.

then out steps this fat disgusting pimple infested white chick who was about my height, but easily pushing around about 75 more pounds beyond my own ample plump bosom. i entered the bank right behind her, so of course i had to stand in line directly behind her. she was talking on her cell phone as she stood there. but even better, she had one of those corded ear pieces stringing down her gross pimpled arm as she yapped away so all the rest of the patrons could hear. even though she was sans a cool new bluetooth device, she obviously was a very important “GOODMOM3″ and damn sure wanted everyone to know it. seriously though, the delusional stank of self-importance was just dripping from this heffer like a 4 day old beer fart just waiting to kill some baby bunnies.

whatever….i quickly stopped paying attention to her as i muttered under my breath about the other retards in there taking way too long to finish up their transactions.

i finally step to the teller (of course i get the cutest girl of the bunch), hand over a check, swipe my car, smile, make a joke, smile again, and say bye.

but as i am walking out….i have to walk past this “GOODMOM3″ lady again. i was already in ignore mode, but i couldn’t help but notice her…..because she was now fupa deep in the point of transaction where she felt she needed to raise her voice in discontent at the teller.

“ummm, excuse me….i went through this about 3 years ago and vowed i would never bank with wells fargo again after they refused to give me a debit card after i was going through a bankruptcy! now my credit is within good standings and i am still having problems with you and everyone that works here!!! why i even bother with you people….”, she’s saying with a huge zit infested face.

she was totally disrespecting the teller, and gosh darn it…..something needed to happen. heh, enter me.

naturally, i say….”oh my god!!! a bankruptcy is fucking your shit up like a deadbeat and you drive around in a minivan that’s labeled ‘GOODMOM3′? shame on you for lying to your kids and the WORLD!” ….and i walk backwards out the door to her jaw dropped muttface…just snickering the whole way out.

heh…..not only were the bank tellers all just laughing, but even another patron waiting in line started clapping at me with a look of “awwww, shit….no you didn’t!”. hahahaha, but seriously…..i can’t stand folks that feel the need to be total cunts to customer service people. like they had anything to do with your situation to begin with?!?!?!?! get a grip, get a clue, and get that bullcrap off your lame minivan cause if i ever see it again i am gonna throw a rock through the windshield just out of purpose!

i now feel complete for the rest of the day though. “GOODMOM3″ my ass! who let’s these ppl breed? when i take over the world…..

:p

abuncha scammers!

by josh on May 25th, 2009

so everyone’s heard about this “credit card bill of rights”….right?

yeah…it all seems great on the surface. it’s there to protect the consumer and keep these crook companies from raping people. well….i knew it seemed fishy.

the problem is, credit card companies rely on fees and penalties just as much as they rely on the interest paid, right? take away some of those ridiculous fees….and how are they going to make up that money? well, they need to make it up somehow.

i could already see some shady shit springing up a few months ago. one card of mine reduced my credit limit by $1000 just for the heck of it. not that i need that higher credit limit, but when something like the balance based on credit limit can factor into your credit score…..why would they reduce the limit of a good standing customer? this is the same card that would raise my credit limit ridiculous amounts (that i didn’t need) every 6 months for the last 3 years or so. now they are taking it back? how the hell does that work?

about 3 months ago *insert another shitty well known credit card company name here* released a very quiet and fine print change in their TOS to cardholders. basically they whispered how they were going to change the payment due dates on their accounts. this change in their TOS just took effect this month, but the original statement was released to customers months ago. as i double check right now? yep….my payment due date was changed from the 9th of every month to the 5th of the month. i pay mine as soon as i get the statement…so it’s not a concern, but why would they do that? how many people do you think always put off their payments until the last possible day? how many people do you think even read their change to the TOS notice 3 months ago and will remember their due dates changed this cycle?

exactly. meanwhile, they can rake in loads of cash on penalties for all the people that missed their due dates. what possible purpose would they have to push due dates back by 4 days otherwise?

fast forward…..to the best scam ever! i received a letter from the first card mentioned above earlier this week. apparently my account info had been “compromised” and as a safety measure they are sending me a new card. ok….thanks?

now, i get the new card….and not to go off on another tangent…..but what the hell ever happen to the days of being able to activate a credit card just by pushing some buttons and verifying some info? it’s all become just another avenue for a shitty sales pitch!

so of course i have to talk to some indian that can barely speak da engliss just to get my new card activated…..and this is where the best scam ever comes into play. the dude asks me if i know why i was sent a new card….and then explains to me that they were informed by a higher up company that my financial information might have been compromised and they wanted to protect me. since i am such a good customer and all.

even better? how are they going to protect me? by offering me a identity protection plan for only $9.99 a month! are you fuckin’ kidding me?!?!?!

1. umm, i use credit card companies because they are already insured and provide account protection in the case of unwarranted charges. last i checked, i was wasn’t getting my credit through fast eddie down on the street corner. if you can’t protect me, then i’ll take my business elsewhere.

2. way to prey on people’s fears just to make more money with this bullshit “protection” service that should just be a part of your normal business practices. sadly, how many people will probably happily sign up for this? it’s no different than boiler room snakes draining ppl’s life savings.

3. the whole story is a load of crap. how do i know this? i haven’t used the card in almost 3 years!!!! not that i am naive enough to think that just automatically makes me safe…..but i’d love to know how my account info got compromised on a card that is basically invisible today?

it’s all a scam. these companies are all being run by crooks and it’s even more foolish to think the govt. really wants to protect consumers. this “credit card bill of rights” is just making these companies come up with new ways to rape ya. what’s even worse….is the fact all the call centers are being contracted out to india. so you are left dealing with someone that really couldn’t care less about your business while they are reading from a script that’s motivated by greed and dishonesty. it’s not their fault……i mean these people are just trying to make a dime too. but if you are going to rape me at least have the balls to do it to my face. don’t pimp out overseas call centers when really it’s some suit living the high life behind it all.

i am beginning to think tyler durden was onto something….

tweaking hell.

by josh on May 22nd, 2009

sooooooo….

where to begin…..

i think my webhost got bought out by another company. they sent me an email a month or so ago about how they were gonna “transition” my site to new servers, etc, etc, etc. of course the whole process was suppose to be flawless, and all that jazz….

well, i decided to check to see if my site was migrated. yeah, no. apparently there were all these errors and all that going on. so…i call the customer service….and the fuckin’ idiot there tries telling me my whole old site is lost and i am basically screwed if i didn’t save it on my local machine. thanks for the help douche bag….

needless to say….my stuff wasn’t lost. and i got everything off the servers and saved copies of everything…..but still….that dude should be fired.

so anyways….i dealt with that….and think i have everything in line. well, while i was at it….i really didn’t like my options to display a “gallery” of images on here. needless to say….i haven’t taken a ton of pictures over the years (least not enough to constitute a “gallery”). but! with my new camera….hoping i’ll start sharing more. maybe….

point is….i got off work early today cause of the holiday….and how did i spend the afternoon? fucking editing css and javascript pages!!!!!! BAH!!!!!

i think i got it working pretty slick now though. i updated my previous post with the new camera pics…..so check out the new shit if ya like.

over and out for now…..have a good holiday.

socal sleazebag of the month: may 2009.

by josh on May 1st, 2009

…..and it’s a new month, so time for a new sleazebag!

i’ve been waiting for a few weeks to crown this gem, and really was hoping her 15 mins would be up….but i guess it’s not. the winner!

miss california, carrie prejean, or as i like to call her….the instant anti-gay marriage media whore. the coverage on this bimbo has just been ridiculous. now she has signed on to do anti-gay marriage campaigns for the “national organization for marriage” (-story here-)

now….i really couldn’t careless what ppl’s opinions are on gay marriage. frankly, i think marriage as a whole is a joke and…well, it’s not the homos that got it there. but what drives me crazy is how this chick has been playing the victim for “just stating her opinion”.

yeah….nice try moron. i don’t think she was even aware that she had an opinion on the subject until she was asked about it on the show. she mumbled and vomited out some words (half of which didn’t even follow a coherent thought)…and now she is like the spokesperson to keep those nasty gross gays from harming the secret sanction of marriage!

just stick the swimsuit competitions please….as you are the socal sleazebag of the month!

ps. philly d hit a good point in the very beginning of this too. perez hilton is a douchecunt on top of all of this garbage.

-click to view-

even i am sick of technology.

by josh on April 18th, 2009

we are wrapped up in the days of twittering, facebooking, live video streaming….and really it can all be done from something as simple as a cell phone. i am just as guilty as the next person realize….so i am not pretending to be above it all. hell, i signed up on twitter over 2 years ago, but just now finally realized how it can be used. and it’s still stupid to me.

however, it got me thinking about the coachella music festival that is going on out in the desert here this weekend. the festival itself has turned into a bit of a bummer on the whole over the years (if you ask me). crappy headliners, not all that great of side acts, and most importantly…..it’s pretty damn expensive to be rotting out in the desert for.

i’ve seen this trend growing more and more as 2009 has kicked in, but with coachella it has gotten just retarded. what am i talking about? every single no name hack is there “reporting live from coachella!” like really? i keep seeing content posted all over the place from ppl that aren’t even involved in the music industry.

for example, KCRW (an indie radio station out of santa monica college) is there providing videos and pictures from the festival grounds. ok, cool….they actually have a lot of the bands playing in their studios for live sets and shit. that makes sense to me.

but then there are others from industries that have nothing to really do with the music…all “reporting live!” i am talking about tech ppl, marketing ppl, social web nerds, etc. OH! and by far the best….is pacsun is reporting live there too! if that doesn’t solidify how lame the whole event has become then i don’t know what else does. kinda makes me laugh though because they canned one of the only decent managers while i was there…stating his job (which was music and entertainment web based promotions/contests/etc) was just not really pertinent to the core demographic. or something along those bullshit lines. 5 years later….they are flinging some dork around the music festival circuit like he’s some underground indie music journalist. i actually feel bad for him though, cause give it a few years and someone will eventually realize what a waste of time and money that is for a fuckin’ mall store chain.

there were ppl from my work talking about going all week too. i think they were just cruisin’ out there on their own dime though. or at least i hope, because again….even they have no real relevance for being there on a work related premise. specially when we are trying to save money.

anyways, i’ve kinda gone off on a tangent here. this technology ppl are using has become more annoying than anything of actual relevance. and you can tell it’s all being headed up by some marketing knob that really doesn’t know anything past their post graduate classroom.

a couple weeks back i was following a sports reporter on twitter during a brewers and padres game. it was fun…she was cute…and yadda, yadda, yadda, but i don’t need life in it’s entirety updated to me through twitter. what’s even worse….is the attention all of this is getting. some other examples? charlie villanueva of the milwaukee bucks was recently slapped on the wrist for twittering during halftime of a game. mark cuban, owner of the dallas mavericks, was fined $25,000 by the NBA for twittering about the horseshit refs.

like really? i think as a whole ppl are putting too much weight and credit on such a dumb internet vessel. for those of you that don’t know what i am talking about? here’s a good explanation of this twitter thing.

that said….i’ll finish up with a video from when coachella was actually still about music fans getting together to party….and not just a big conglomerate of corporate america and wannabe celebrities whoring themselves out. smells like sundance indeed.

-click to view-

ps. pretty funny how the dude makes a “friendster” reference, cause that was from 2005 and on dawn of these new technologies. pretty sure it sums up exactly what i am talking about here.

socal sleazebag of the month. 4.09

by josh on April 1st, 2009

so i realized crowning a sleazebag a week might be a bit of a stretch on the negative…so i am just gonna go monthly with this thing.  i don’t update this enough to not have a weekly sleazebag take up a lot of the wonderful joyous content i provided.

however, it’s a new month….so i have a good sleazebag to crown.

unfortunately, this person does not have a name or identity as of yet.

full news story and video:

poor girl.  all cause some dumbshit ran a light

however….this brings on a whole different rant.  USC is NOT all that great and this just proves to me that it really does reside in the heart of the shithole that is los angeles.  don’t tell anyone that goes (or went) there that though.  they all act like it’s just the cream of the crop when it comes to colleges.  “look at us, we’re sooooo cool and hip cause we are overpaying out the ass for nothing more than an another average state school!”  a state school that happens to be in the middle of the ghetto!

ok, granted, this kinda thing can happen anywhere…..but even though i went to a small UWM in milwaukee….the ppl there were aware of the fact there were kids all over the place.  they paid attention, and realized kids crossing the street unsafely wasn’t all that rare.

to make it worse, if i had to guess who was responsible for this hit and run?  another student that probably was driving around all wasted and got freaked out by the whole thing.  see, ….and this is where the USC state of mind comes into play.  there really is this sense of entitlement and above the law mentality with a lot (not all!) of the ppl that go there.  at least currently….so i am not talking about the old timers from USC 20 years ago either.

but i digress….

so whoever you are….mr. hit and runner…..you are the socal sleazebag of the month.  you took a young girl’s life right at the point she had moved out to beautiful los angeles to go to that immaculate USC.

ps. parents….next time send your kids to a college in a real college town.  no degree is worth the garbage they are subject to in places like USC.

corporate blogs=sweet content.

by josh on March 1st, 2009

so….like a typical disgruntled ex-employee…..i ventured to land of pacsun.com this morning.  just to see what my old company was up to.

….and oh man did i get some giggles.  it just amazes me these asshats are still actually in business.

why?  one example….is how their sweet community section is featuring a really kickass video about how to clean girls shoes.  (video here)

why is this funny to me?  they stopped carrying girls shoes over a year ago….dropping a few million dollars from the roxy shoes account alone.  but good thing they are there to tell ya how to clean the shoes they don’t even sell!

….and that’s really my beef with these corporate fags trying to get into the whole web 2.0 realm.  blogging, youtubing, etc…..they are clueless.  they have no clue who their customer is, nor do they know how to feed them entertaining relevant content.  i swear….half of this stuff is more just meant for the drones in the corporate offices to beat their meat to.  meanwhile, they are paying over $150+K (if not more) in salary to the morons coming up with this complete garbage.

why does it bug me though?  i suggested they do some kinda webisode-esque feature over 6 years ago….and no one listened.  so in typical fashion….they are just now breaking into the realm as nothing but complete followers…..instead of actual trend setters.  which is fine, if they actually knew within their corporate walls just how much of posers they really are.  but they don’t.

it goes beyond this though.   as a whole i think most corporate blogs lack any kinda real interest.  they are using them as advertisement pitches, instead of selling product through worthwhile content.  is it the writer’s faults?  no….it’s the moron marketing big wig asshats that are pushing blogs/videos cause they heard it was the next big thing.  all while never realizing you still need content your viewers are actually interested in.  or even better….as in the example above…..content that is actually relevant to the fuckin’ product you are trying to sell.

*shakes head*

it makes me wonder if any of the ppl pulling these strings even have a grasp on internet media and social trends as a whole?  cause as far as i can tell, it’s nothing but a resume laced with bullshit titles trying way too hard.  sad really…..cause there is, and has been….so much potential there.

what do i know though.  i am just an actual internet user/dork.